Time Management Tuesday - Guest Ovidia Yu

I'm super excited to be debuting my author time management interview series with my Lotus Lit Agency sister Ovidia Yu. Last September, William Morrow released Ovidia's latest work, a cozy mystery set in Singapore. Auntie Lee's Delight, is a fun read and a terrific view into Singapore's culture.

Ovidia was kind enough to stop by and share some of her time management tips and tricks that she's picked up over the course of her twenty year writing career.

How long have you been writing?

Since I was 10 or 11 years old, when I wrote adventure stories in the style of the Enid Blyton and Noel Streatfeild books I loved so much.

Do you write full time or part time (do you have a day job besides writing?)?

Now I’m writing full time. But the fun fiction writing is sort of part time since I also do some commercial writing on the side.

Are you planner/plotter/architect or a pantser/gardener?

Both! Before I start I plan and plot and structure and it’s the greatest fun. I’ve got about three plots spinning around in my head right now. And I like to have to have a shape that feels good to me. The problem is when I actually sit down and start writing my (extremely) detailed plots just get forgotten as the characters take over. But then when I finish a draft and have this hideously overwritten, overloaded and over lengthy mass of material (the gardener / panster product) I switch back to planner stage and start weeding out stuff that doesn’t work and introduce borders and lawn sprinklers etc in the right places.

How do you balance your time between writing and editing?

Usually the writing comes faster. It takes me about 3 months to produce a rough draft. Then I’ll take about 6 months to work through it slashing and rewriting. Usually this gets repeated a couple of times so it’s usually the third draft that feels ready enough to get submitted to the agent. But occasionally when I get stalled on something I’ll crush down my instincts and send it in early. Like I have a piece I’ve been sitting on for almost two years and over seven drafts. I know it’s not ready but I’ve submitted it and I’m cringing now just at the thought of her reading it. Yes she’s nice and she’ll be nice about it, but I shouldn’t do that to people (ie make them read stuff that’s not ready)

What is your system for getting your writing done? (e.g do you have word count goals, write on a particular day or at a particular time?)

I set myself minimum targets. Very low minimums—the word count minimum is governed my quota on the Magic Spreadsheet which I discoveredvia Mur Lafferty and which I really love. Though I’ve broken my chain now because I’ve been doing copy edits which doesn’t give me word count totals. And the time minimum is a 20 minute pomodoro on the KanbanFlow timer.

(MJ Note: Be still my project management, beating heart! Magic spreadsheets and Kanban timers? Wow. I'm so impressed. I added links to the tools. I'll be talking more about these in a coming post, but if you're interested in trying them, the links should get you started)

These low minimums make it easier for me to get started and once I start it’s easier to go on. So on a ‘good’ day I’ll probably write about 3 hours and 1,200 words.

But that’s when I’m writing without a deadline. When I’ve got something due on deadline I use the project targets on Scrivener which lets me see how many words a day I need to get down to finish in time. I usually finish ahead of time so the great thing about this system is that it allows me to take a complete day off now and then without guilt. For instance I spent this morning walking around the Bukit Timah forest reserve because I didn’t have anything else ‘due’ except this questionnaire. But tomorrow I’ll be back on the next draft and my daily word quota.

What is your biggest writing time management distraction and what have you found works to overcome it?

For a while it was web surfing. I would look up something and then get distracted and go on to looking up something else and before I knew it the KanbanFlow timer would go off (break time!) and I’d realize I had a head full of fascinating facts irrelevant facts, a ton of ideas for new characters and books and hadn’t been writing at all. So now I just note down what I want to look up and look them all up during one of my ‘online’ time sessions… I usually give myself three, at the beginning of the day, at lunch time and at the end of the day. And if any time is leftover I allow myself to visit Facebook and Quora which is incentive to research stuff fast!

As we all know, writing is as much these days about building a platform to attract readers as it is getting the actual writing done. How do you fit social media into your writing time?

I’m afraid I don’t know enough about social media to talk about platforms. When my book came out I was lucky enough to have super energetic angels assigned to do publicity and they’re the ones who introduced me to writers and bloggers and readers who have since become friends. Now I’ve met them I read their blogs and books whenever I can and they’ve been very supportive and encouraging of my efforts and books.

If you could tell your writing start up self anything about managing your writing time, what would it be?

Write as much as you can. When you can’t write any more, read. When you can’t read any more, grab the dogs and get outside.
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After writing over 30 plays over 20 years, Ovidia Yu wrote her first children’s book, The Mudskipper, which was shortlisted for the Scholastic Asian Book Award and the Hedwig Anuar Book Award, and Aunty Lee’s Delights, a Singapore murder mystery published by William Morrow last September. The sequel, Aunty Lee’s Deadly Special will be published in Fall 2014.

If you found Ovidia's tips as interesting and helpful as I did, please share them with your social media network through the buttons below.

If you have a question or comment for Ovidia, she'll be around to reply.  

The world does not need another writer blog - Time Management Tuesday Tip

When I first started on the road to creating the dreaded “author platform”, the one thing I was 100% sure of is that I did not want to be an “authors for authors” blog – a blog that caters to other authors. There is absolutely nothing wrong with this approach for platform building. And I’m thankful every day to my fellow authors who are out there adding value to our community. I just never could see myself doing that. Others are much more informed and have way more passion for the topics of “writer sausage making” than I do.

Over the months, though, as I’ve gotten my feet down, I’ve realized there is a specialized area that I can probably add a bit of value and (lucky me) it’s an area I tend to have some passion around (translation, don’t get me started talking about it or you may not be able to shut me up until you’ve agreed to let me professionally torture you in my area of expertise).

As I mentioned in my Writer Wednesday post Just Finish It, one of the largest issues I come across in my critique groups is writers having trouble balancing it all and getting a work across the finish line.

In my real life, not just when I’m playing Author on the internet, I am a certified project manager. I strongly believe that not only should whatever you’re working on have a project plan, your whole life should have one. Goal completion does not just happen. There is a science to time management. Even those who manage to complete their projects just fine, thank you, could always pick up a tip or trick to being more efficient.

Let’s face it, the majority of writers have a day job. Even those writers who are lucky enough to be able to write full time are juggling that with managing their writing business. Gone are the days where publishers and agents did a big chunk of that. Now writers, even traditionally published ones, but especially those who are self-published, spend countless hours on things like marketing and accounting.

Given that, I will be launching a new series called Time Management Tuesday. The series will alternate between providing information on the science of project and time management and interviews from other authors who will share their tips and tricks to making it happen.

So, without further ado:

This week’s Time Management Tuesday Tip: You must pay attention!

Time management is a science, but like the science of weight loss, one size does not fit all.

The basics of weight loss are simple – eat less, move more. But many other facets play into that. For example, some body types are more sensitive to carbohydrates than others. Some body types are genetically predisposed not to give up weight or not to lose weight through exercise.

Time management/efficiency principals work in a similar way. Essentially the basics of time management are simple – focus on the right things at the right time for the right amount of duration. But how your brain is wired to produce, will greatly affect what works and what doesn’t for you.

So what’s a writer to do? – Start paying attention.

The first step when taking on any “be more efficient” program is to pay more attention. Get off of autopilot and start understanding how you work. When are you tired? How long can you go before you need a break? What are your derailers? What keeps you from getting to it? Are you simply a procrastinator or do you have something bigger going on from an emotional perspective? Are you better at night or first thing in the morning?

There’s a stuffy old business saying in the lean manufacturing space – “We expect what we inspect.” In other words, if you want to understand something, change it for the better, you have to pay attention to it.

Over the course of the coming weeks and months, I’ll be providing templates to help you begin to sort out your own productivity style, as well as additional research on human efficiency and time management. But none of it will help if you don't start paying attention to how you work.

Stay tuned next week for an interview with cozy mystery author Ovidia Yu on her tips and tricks for managing her writer life.

If you found this interesting, please share it with your network below with the sharing buttons below.

Also, I have a great slate of authors lined up in my interview series, but am always looking for more. If you are a published author, and would like to share your time management story, leave a comment, send me an email or hit me on Twitter.

The Worst Day of Her Life

When my mother was sick, any time the phone rang, I reflexively cringed. Although she wasn’t living with us, we were the front-line defense for any issue at the nearby assisted living center where we had moved her after my father’s passing.

In addition to other issues, my mother had been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. After three years of dealing with her disease, we were more fortunate than some, in that she still had about 50% lucid moments. There were also times, though, when she couldn’t remember my children’s names, that I wasn’t sixteen or that she had lung cancer and COPD.

“I breathe just fine,” she’d say while cursing at the staff for insisting she wear her oxygen.

Shaking off my Pavlov response to the center’s number popping up in the caller ID, I picked up the receiver.

“Hi Melinda, we have a situation with your mother and we need you to come out,” the center director said at a more frantic pace than usual.

After caring for someone with Alzheimer’s for a while, I’d learned to triage the chaos the symptoms caused. Refusal to wear her adult diaper (because she didn’t remember having an incontinence problem) would require one level of engagement. Her trying to leave the center because she didn’t believe she lived there would be another. Thankfully, over the years, we had developed a good, trusting relationship with the center staff. When the director didn’t immediately tell me what was going on, I knew we were probably looking at some kind of Deafcon 1 scenario.

“She’s not hurt, but I really need you to come as soon as you can. I’ll explain when you get here.”

I heard the noise of the commotion from my mom’s room from down the hall when I entered the center. The door to her room was open. The center director stood in the doorway and two staff attendants were in the room.

Tears streamed down my mother’s face. Short and frail, in her Tinkerbell nightgown and clutching her vintage purse, she looked like a crying child.

“Why won’t you help me find him! We have to find him,” she yelled as I entered the room. Upon seeing me, relief overcame her. “Melinda, these charlatans won’t let me call the police to find Pete.”

I spent the next couple of hours trying to help my mother understand that her husband of forty years had died, that he wasn’t coming home to take care of her and that the police couldn’t help her find him.

Hearing me saying it and reading his obituary was as painful to her as the morning she found his cold body on the bathroom floor. Added to her grief was an overwhelming shame and sadness that she hadn’t remembered something so important to her.

Looking back on it, I can pinpoint that day, that event, as the day my mother died. Sure she physically fought on for a few years after but her spirit had left the party.

Last night I caught an interview Seth Rogen on a news show talking about his testimony to Congress regarding his Alzheimer’s foundation. His mother-in-law has the disease. It was a great interview and I hope you’ll watch it. Unfortunately, a lot of Senators didn’t even bother to show up.

Today Alzheimer’s is the 6^th leading cause of death in the US, affects 5 million people and costs our country $203 billion dollars annually. It is the only cause of death that increased from 2000 to 2010. Every 68 seconds, someone is diagnosed. If you’re looking for a great book on the topic, I highly recommend my Lotus Lit agency sister Nancy Stearns Bercaw’s book Brain in a Jar.

Both of my parents had cancer. My father, after beating cancer, died of a heart attack. I can truly say that there is no worse disease, no crueler way to die, than Alzheimer’s.

Solving a riddle as complicated as the brain isn’t easy. As Seth points out, right now, the biggest obstacle to treatment and a cure is money.

So this is a shameless plea for you to give. Give to Seth’s foundation Hilarity for Charity. Give to Cure Alzheimer’s (the highest rated Alzheimer’s charity).

If you can’t give, but want to help support the fight against this horrible disease, please help share my post or links to the foundations through your social media network. Social Media buttons are below. Thank you!

Writer Wednesday - Finish It!

One of my top ten all time favorite movies is Chariots of Fire. If you've never seen it, it's worth your rental money. A mix of sport, history, religion, love, inspiration and hot guys in tight shorts - what's not to love.

While talking to a couple of my critique partners recently, I was reminded of a great scene from the movie.

For those of you without video access, one of the main characters, Eric Liddell, gives a speech comparing getting through life to running a race:

You came to see a race today. To see someone win. It happened to be me. But I want you to do more than just watch a race. I want you to take part in it. I want to compare faith to running in a race. It's hard. It requires concentration of will, energy of soul. You experience elation when the winner breaks the tape - especially if you've got a bet on it. But how long does that last? You go home. Maybe you're dinner's burnt. Maybe you haven't got a job. So who am I to say, "Believe, have faith," in the face of life's realities? I would like to give you something more permanent, but I can only point the way. I have no formula for winning the race. Everyone runs in her own way, or his own way. And where does the power come from, to see the race to its end? From within. 

Of course this quote is much more powerful when delivered with a Scottish accent :)

I have two critique partners (waving hello to them) who are fantastic writers. But they are struggling to finish their work. They both can give genuine reasons why they haven't - jobs, family, kids, illness...and of course, all of those reasons are valid. I struggle sometimes too.

For these two writers, though, I think it's more than that. I think they haven't been able to finish because they don't believe - they don't believe they are good enough or they don't believe they can.

I tell them all the time - a certain magic happens when you finish something. Suddenly you are a person who can. And how you think about yourself and your tasks, whether it's writing or anything else you are striving for in life, becomes different.

But to embrace that magic, you have to finish.

"So where does the power come from, to see the race to its end? From within."

To my very excellent critique partners (and all of you out there struggling to finish something) - close your eyes and believe. You are worthy.

"You Worry about Youself"

Photo via Ryan Hunley from YouTube

As either a parent or a kid, at sometime in your life I'm betting you have either said or had said to you something comparable to one or more of the following:

• If Jimmy jumped off a bridge would you follow him?
• I'm not Sally's mom
• You've got plenty of lumps in your own potatoes (one of my mom's favorites). Similar sentiments include things such as "since when is your garden free of weeds" and the biblical oldie but goody "Let he without sin cast the first stone".

Last night I caught myself leveling the "You worry about yourself and let your sister and me worry about her" variation of this. The momism fling occurred in reply to my four-year-old daughter's insistence that her sixteen-year-old sister should have to go to bed at the same time as her so that she's not cranky.

And that's when I had an aha moment and realized maybe I should be taking my own advice.

As my day had worn on, I had hit a place where I felt overwhelmed with the tasks in front of me. Not because I couldn't accomplish them, but more because I felt like even if I did them, it probably wouldn't matter. The conversation in my head went something along the lines of the following:

• OMG. My twitter feed fills up with 1000+ tweets a second. I bet everyone else's does too. Nothing I say is going to get through that noise
• Another link reminding me that even if I did finish or publish my book there are 300,000 novels published every year. How will anyone ever find mine?
• Do you know how many established blogs there are out there? Why would anyone read mine!
• Great, another update on google's algorithm. No recognition for guest posting now. No one is ever going to find me.
• The majority of businesses still fail within in the first five years and there are more businesses being started now than at any time in history.
• This one article alone list 35+ places I should be delivering content to. I will never keep up.
• Sigh. "So and so Queen of my occupation" is so much better than I am. What am I doing?

I'm sure you have some variation of this self pity party that you play in your head sometimes too. As we look around at the vast activity that happening in the social media space, it's easy to get lost in the feeling that we will never break through all the noise and be heard. Whether we're starting a new business, launching a new book or other creative endeavor, the fight for discovery and recognition is the same.

Of course, the answer to all of these self doubts is "so what, what are you going to DO about it?" You've chosen to do whatever it is you're doing. Hopefully, you've put together a plan to support your ultimate goal. None of the above sentiments, even if they are all true, will get you any closer to reaching said goal.

That's not to say that you shouldn't review your plan or where you are in regards to your competition. Self awareness is important. Realistically, though, you don't have a lot of options. The only choices you have are to quit, change your strategy or work harder on the one you have. 

And, if you notice, all of those options are personal decisions as well. No one in the great "out there" is going to make that choice for you. So in the end, there's really only one thing we can do:

"You worry about you."

If you are feeling overwhelmed by the vastness of the universe and your place in it, like no matter how much you try to push the rock up the hill you just don't seem to be moving it at the same pace as everyone else, STOP. 

Put on the blinders. Work your plan. You worry about you. And the rest will take care of itself.

Magic Monday - Ode To The Story

I'm one of those "count your blessings" people. I believe in silver linings, possibilities and being grateful for what I have while I reach for the next level. Magic Mondays celebrates that.

     One of my favorite Tedtalks is from Daniel Crosby entitled You Aren't That Great. If you haven't ever seen it, I urge you to spend the twenty minutes it takes to view. In it, he postulates that if you are one in a million, with six billion people on the planet, that means there are 6,000 people on the planet exactly like you.

     I spent last night watching the new PBS episode of Sherlock. It's one of the few TV indulgences I allow myself.

     This weekend my four year old and I discovered a previously hidden cache of books; a holdover from our move. They previously belonged to the older kids and were meant to be handed down at some point. When we opened the box, her face beamed and she was quite sure she'd hit the jackpot.

     My dad worked for the same place fore forty years. He was a metallurgist. In the arrogance of his youth, he was sure he could revolutionize the way steel was made. In his early career, he implemented a redesign of the standard blast furnace. Later in his career, he traveled to client sites helping to troubleshoot quality issues in the steel. That a coal miner's son had even made it to college and into management, is a story all on its own.
     When he passed away, a bunch of his work group showed up at the funeral. While they were there to pay their respects, many of them also came to see each other again, to swap stories of the old days.

     These stories bonded those men, as much as I'm bonded to other fans of Holmes and Watson through the hasthag #Sherlock. As much as handing down favorite stories bonded my girls this weekend.

     As an author, we're often enamored with words. The way they sound in our heads and rolling off our tongues. The way the perfect word choice can illicit one emotion over another or the way the a subtle change in emotion can be garnered through that choice. With authors, and many readers, words are big.

    This weekend I was reminded of the power of the stories delivered by those words to connect us. Stories do more than entertain us or move us. They represent who we are. They tie us together.

    I think Daniel Crosby is right that it's true that I'm not great. We're not that great. We even may not be that unique.
   
    But we all have a great, unique story, a story that can inspire, entertain, move, inform or, most importantly, bind us to others. On this Magic Monday, I'm grateful for stories.

What are some of your favorite stories and how have they touched your life?

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5 Tips for Getting Back on the Wagon After You've Stopped Writing

I'm in a long distant friendship. Luckily we're the types of friends that don't need constant communication to maintain our bond. Every time we get back together after some lapse, we usually fall right back into lockstep. That's both a gift and a curse.

There are times when other things have taken my attention and before I know it, a couple of weeks have passed since I communicated with my friend. At that point something strange can happen - I start to feel guilty for not communicating.

You would think that would be a push for me to pick up the phone or drop an email. Human nature being what it is, I'm now aware that that feeling can cause me to do the exact opposite.

I put it off longer. Sometimes that's because I'm still in the throws of things. I know I don't have time to write the lengthy communication that's in my head and writing something short seems "less than". Sometimes I just feel bad about not having done it and rather than dealing with that feeling I avoid it.

When this occurs, the more time passes, the more intense the feeling becomes and the more I avoid it.

Of course, this experience can apply to lots of things in life. Like working on a novel. Or, in my case, keeping up with social media.

You would think that the answer is simple  - duh, get going!

But I've found that to be easier said than done. Starting again is hard. I'm sure a psych major in the group could lend something scientific to the conversation to corroborate the feeling I have that keeps me avoiding my task. I so wish I could just get going.

But here I am. So If you are like me, and find that you have fallen off the wagon of doing something you very much would like to do, but are struggling to get past your feelings for neglecting your task to get started again, I offer the following tips.

1. Recognize out loud that this is where you are -
   You have to get honest with yourself that you are in avoidance mode. You have to admit that you are in this place because you feel ashamed that you let your goal go or that you feel like a failure or that your mad at yourself for your poor time management skills or whatever personal demon is tied up in this for you. For many people, it's not as simple as "I got busy and then it got hard". From my experience, if your procrastinating restarting, there is usually something bigger tied to it.
    
2. Review how you got there and look for ways to keep it from happening again -
   In September I had a death in my family. This was my derailing event. I spent October in mourning. By November I was off to the Nano races. Then came the holidays and the need to edit my nano book while my day job was light during said holidays.
   
   But looking at closer, those things just exasperated the fact that I didn't have a good social media plan in place to start with. I stopped writing my blog because every post required a lot of thought as to what it was going to be. I didn't have any articles in reserve and I wasn't all too sure what I wanted my blog to be when it grew up. So when derailers happened, I was eager to use them to avoid dealing with bigger underlying issues.
   
   I was going to recommend this as a last step. But as I was working my way back on my own wagon, this step was important in helping me to get through the next steps. I now have a plan to deal with the above. And having that plan makes starting again easier because I know I'm more likely to be successful this time. Sometimes the answer is just "stuff happens" but often times there are bigger lessons to learn if you go looking.
    
3. Work up to it -
   Of course the obvious solution to fixing this dilemma is to just dive back in. But I've found for me I can't do that. My internal systems recoil at the thought of it. Whether it's getting back on to the diet train or the writing wagon, if you've been struggling to make the leap, I highly recommend that you set a date in the future. Everyday think about it happening. Roll over in your head what you need to do to prepare. It will still feel awkward on the day you are supposed to start. But it won't feel as awkward as it would have. You'll have regained some of the momentum you lost from stopping even though you haven't done the deed.
    
4. Ask for help -
   Find a friend or loved one who you can share your shame with and your plan for overcoming it. You need to let yourself off the hook and it's easier to do when someone else tells you it's not the end of the world. The understanding you get will also help you want to stick to your plan for relaunch.
    
5. Dive in -
   In the end, you still just have to man up. It will feel awkward (this does for sure). But you will stumble your way through. I promise. It will not end in disaster. And in fact, you will feel a sense of accomplishment once you are a few days, posts, chapters, friend communication exchanges (or whatever fits for progress in the wagon you are trying to climb back on) into it.

For me, I'm hoping this marks a more thoughtful return to my social media adventure. I'm coming back armed with a better plan for success.

How about you? Have you ever quit something you didn't want to and then had a hard time starting again? If so, what tricks worked for you to get going?

NaNoers -- EAT THAT FROG!

Happy NaNoWriMo! A writing friend asked me the other day if I had any time management tips to help her get through NaNo. Here’s what I told her:

“Eat a live frog first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day.” -- Mark Twain

Confession #1 – I am a not-so-closeted self-help junkie.

One reason I gravitate towards them is because they inevitably offer great stories.  Even books where the advice doesn’t quite fit you (and I’m not sure I’ve ever read one where I didn’t pick up at least one new thing) can be appreciated for the telling of a good story or two.

Confession #2 – I tend to buy self-help books the same way I do fiction – Cover Art. I’m one of the 22% of readers who give great importance to a book cover. I’ve found some of my most favorite books this way – Big Stone Gap, Garden Spells, The Last Time They Met (whose cover is much more impacting in a book store than on line). I’m also a sucker for clever titles.

So when I saw the above book several years back from Brian Tracey, my intrigue went to high and I had to have it.

Thank goodness, too. To this day the premise of the book is a go-to strategy that has snuck in my subconscious, and, like a song earwig, springs itself on me, usually when I’m under a false impression that everything is hunky dory fine.

Eat that Frog is based on the Mark Twain quote above. Tracey re-frames the quote so that your frog =’s the hardest, hairiest, rottenest and (probably) most important task you have to do in any given day and it should be tackled before any other thing in your day.

Frogs are also tasks we are most likely to procrastinate. Like getting our words in each day for NaNo.

Eating your frog first thing sets up your day to end well with easier tasks, and it ensures you’ll have energy to clear your list because you accomplished something big first, which is energizing. If you have two frogs to eat in any given day, his advice is to eat your ugliest frog first.

He goes on to offer 21 tactics to help support finding and swallowing those croakers.

So to answer my friend - whenever I find myself overwhelmed by my to-do list, I go frog hunting.

What’s your best advice for surviving Nano?

Can Stella Get Her Groove Back?

(photo courtesy of Bob from the chive.com)

A Creator’s guide to surviving the winter of our discontent when tragedy strikes.

 “Writing a book is a horrible, exhausting struggle, like a long bout of some painful illness. One would never undertake such a thing if one were not driven by some demon whom one can neither resist or [sic] understand.” – George Orwell, Why I Write

My four year old is in a blocks phase. Actually it’s a tower phase. She’ll build a tower with almost anything that presents itself – those jelly collections at the pancake house, vegetable cans from the pantry, the new pile of library books…

I admit that this is an OCD game I can get behind. I love to see how tall we can get the tower before it starts to wobble, before the architecture cracks at the bottom and causes the top to finally topple.

Several weeks ago my family experienced the unexpected, tragic death of a close family member.  As regular readers know, I was already in the middle of a major life transitionwith a cross country move and change in employment, all of which are on every top “life stressors” lists for a reason.

Since the funeral, I understandably haven’t been myself. It was enough to send my creative balance toppling.

The emotions of creative types often live at the surface and run deep. That’s a good thing, serving us well as we channel it into whatever creative endeavor we’ve chosen.

This latest event was a reminder of what a delicate balance the whole thing is - too much emotion and we are blinded, unable to produce or produce at our best, cascading into a spiral where we end up chopping off our ears or obliterating ourselves with cocaine (no worries, my ears are still attached and I'm not in need of rehab. And, no, that's not the denial talking).

So what’s a girl in mourning who typically writes lighthearted, funny mysteries to do?

For me what’s suffered most is my social media “platform building”. This blog for instance which hasn’t had an update for weeks. Anything even remotely twitter related…I want people to go away. At least for a minute. I need time to process, to get back into balance.

My writing (thankfully) hasn’t suffered. I’m not writing comedy, but I’m writing. A new WIP I’ve had churning for a while. I won’t know if it’s any good until I get past my current funk, but words are hitting the page and that means there’s at least a foundation to edit against.

In the meantime, I’ve been contemplating others in my situation. I’d previously posted 25 things to do when you just can’t write.

But this is different. This is how to get writing again. Or what to do when you shouldn’t  be writing because that balance just isn’t quite there. Because tragedy. Or life.

What follows isn’t one of those “you should do this” list. Managing emotion, grief, sometimes depression, for any creative type is such a personal thing, often cultivated over years. But if you're recovering from a tragedy or even an all around snapping turtle blues rough time, it might give you just one new idea, one different perspective, one extra thing to try that might help re-balance your stack. 

Here’s what’s been helping me get my way back to center:

·         Be Physical – Scientifically proven to be better than antidepressants. A lot of writers find walking a big comfort. Me, I demoed my bathroom. Nothing like a five pound sledge smashing into porcelain tile, followed by the revving sound of the saws-all as it clears the drywall. Seriously, better than therapy.

·         Lower Expectations – Happy is not the goal if you want to be happy says the geeks. Productive, good goal. Not sad – I’ll take it. Out of my pajamas earns stickers on the star chart.

·         Create Anyway – Writers write. It will probably suck. It will feel awkward. You’ll know it’s not your best work. But, magically, it will help. It will heal. It will be a release.

·         Mixed Media therapy – If you’re a writer, paint. Painter? Sculpt. Your insides are probably longing to create still and doing something in a media outside your norm will give your ego permission to suck and do it anyway which will allow for the above bullet to do its thing. I’m currently experimenting in pumpkin and candy corn.

·         Routines Help – eat, sleep, work, kids, write time…the same thing, every day. Routines allow the body to function so that the mind can work through its stuff unburdened by having to make every day decisions.

·         Meditate – Every day for 20 minutes. Whether you manage to do it well or not, the act of trying, the act of practicing stillness, will allow the soul to take a timeout

·         Purge – find a friend you can unload to, write a letter that spews it all out, join a support group…find a way to get it out in a safe place. See writing as a healer link above

·         Give Yourself Permission - Tragedy is supposed to suck and grief moves at its own pace. Get off your own back and give yourself permission to feel like awful for a while.

·         Ask For Help – I don’t know many people who are good at this. This comes with being a Type A with a bunch of Type A friends. But sometimes we have to realize it’s our only option for moving forward. Whether it’s something small, like asking those around you to carry a bit more until you’re back on your feet, or spending some comfy couch time with a pro, you owe it to those who love you not to let your balance issues get too far out of control. Asking for help isn’t weak. It’s what gets strong people through tough times.

Many of you have sent warm wishes and good thoughts. Thanks for that. Those help too. So does your patience while I’m working to re-balance.

Creative friends – what’s your go to for restoring your balance when life knocks you down? 

Need Inspiration? I got "The Call"

A very special thank you to the fabulous Michelle Hauck for hosting the story of my journey to landing my agent, the wonderful and terrific Priya Doraswamy from Lotus Lane Lit. This is my first guest post ever and I appreciate Michelle's kindness.

Click here to read.

And while you're there check out the other inspirational call stories or take a look at Michelle's latest book.

How You (and most writers I know) are Just Like Nicolas Sparks

While trolling the interwebs looking for advice on how to handle my agent “call”, I ran into this series of great post from bestselling Nicolas Sparks on how he landed an agent and ultimate publishing deal.

I highly recommend you read the series. But here is what I learned – Before becoming a bestselling author, he was a lot like you and me.

-        If you’ve received more than 20 rejections, you’re like Nick. -  He only had one offer from one agent. 24 agents said no, even those who had read the novel. The one agent that said yes was fresh out of college and never sold anything before.

-        Even successful writers don’t write the best query letters – Check out his query letter for the Notebook.- I’m sure back in its day this letter was good, but as members of any of the query websites such as agentqueryconnect or querytracker would attest, this letter would most likely get a quick and tidy form rejection today.

-         If you have a day job and write whenever you can fit it in, you’re like Nick - Before he sold his novel, he had a day job. He fit writing in on the side, and his wife generously put up with him being a consumed writer. He writes five or six days a week. 
 If you have books in the trunk, you’re like Nick - He had two other shelved books before finally making it with the Notebook
 If you’re hoping for even a paltry advance for something you wrote, you’re like Nick. - The day he sold his novel he was hoping for an offer that would pay off his credit card or maybe let them get a second car. Instead, he was offered a life changing million dollars.

The moral of this story is one that gets repeated often in our world – even overnight successes aren’t really. They struggled just like you.

But they never, ever gave up the dream.

How many ways are you like Nick?

One Size Does Not Fit All

I am afflicted with what is referred to in urban slang as Jesus toes (no offense intended to my Christian friends), or, more clinically, as Morton toes, where my second toe is larger than my first. And not just by a bit. It is head and shoulders above the rest.

What this means in practical terms (besides the fact that if I ever lose a finger, I'm golden) is I am forever having to buy new socks (because sock makers expect girls' feet to slant) and that there are some high heels I can never ever wear, despite how much I covet them.

No one ever thinks that socks, beyond the basic sizes, are not a "one size fits all" item. People assume they are ubiquitous.

Similarly, people often assume that there is a one size fits all system for accomplishing big goals like writing the great American novel, losing weight or starting a business.

I had someone tell me yesterday that if I wasn't writing everyday, I wasn't serious about my writing.

To this well intended person I say - What a bunch of bunk! My foot will never fit in that shoe. And thankfully, after years of foot ache, I have learned that, and now, despite how tempting it sounds, I resist the slingbacks with the shiny buckle.

I'm sure you've heard it all before, too - You must write everyday. You must have a word goal. You must eliminate adverbs...

And it's not just writers who hear these things. Anyone trying to accomplish something, from starting a business to losing weight, will hear similar advice.

It starts innocently. When attempting a complicated new path, we naturally read everything we can, eager to not repeat mistakes of the successful people before us. Over time and the internet (because if you read it on the internet it must be true), that beginners advice becomes instantiated as a law.

But one size does not fit all. We are each built with different metabolisms, productivity and creativity engines and feet.

Whether you are on a journey to a smaller waist line or moving people with your prose, there is no one thing that everyone must do to be successful. Anyone who tells you otherwise is full of bananas.

In my post on how to stop your yo-yo writing diet, I noted the importance of having a system for fitting writing into your daily life, and that's something I firmly stand behind.

But your system and my system may not look anything alike. You need a system that will work best with your style, that supports your strengthens and curbs your weaknesses. For some people, even that won't work for them. They need to be free of the pressure of a system or plan to create well.

The key is to learn what shoes hurt your feet, or in this case, what writing adages do and don't work best for you.

The road to productivity and creativity is paved with self discovery.

So, for anyone who needs permission from the internet, here you go - You may not write everyday. You may not ever have a word count goal. You may be an adverb loving fool with Jesus toes who will never be able to wear the beautiful Manolo Blahniks.

Writer friends, what writing adages have you found most and least helpful? Post them up in the comments.

25 Productive Alternatives When You Just Can’t Write

Have your imaginary friends stopped talking to you? Is your muse on vacation?

I don’t have writers block. I'm in a writes lull. My main manuscript is on submission. I was working on book two in the series, but if book one doesn’t sell, I might backburner it and focus on a new project. I don’t want to get the new project going just yet, though, until there is some resolution on book 1. No since changing gears if I won’t need to. Besides, starting a new project would be an emotional commitment that I’m not ready for yet.

But I don’t want to be a slug. So if you are like, in a lull, unable to work on a manuscript, here are 25 other things (with resource links) that we can be doing to spend the time productively.

1.       Support fellow authors with shout outs on twitter and facebook

2.       Walk – All the cool writers do it

3.       Pre-write a month’s worth of blog posts around a particular theme

4.       Find and post helpful advice on a writer’s forum – absolutewrite.com, querytracker.net, agentqueryconnect.com

5.       Find, read and review a book from a first time published or Indie author. Nora Roberts does not need your review J

6.       Put critique karma in the bank by being a beta reader or critique partner. I use Ladies Who Critique and Scribophile

7.       Hang out on the internet somewhere you wouldn’t normally – arts, science and food, oh my

8.       Set up a social media calendar for the rest of the year

9.       Learn one new grammar tip a day. I like Grammar Girl and Daily Grammar

10.   If you aren’t already on it, join and dive in to Goodreads. If you are, up your gaming by participating more

11.   Set up your Google+ profile and presence, (the second largest social community on the web) including linking your author presence so that your picture and bio show in google search

12.   Sketch or draw – It makes you see better

13.   Guest blog – everyone is always looking for a way to mix up their online content and it’s a great marketing tool

14.   Host a contest – big or small work but engenders lots of goodwill

15.   Join a genre fan group – be a fan before you need fans

16.   Go somewhere new – bar, restaurant, concert at the local school. Or try communing with nature scientifically proven to up your creativity

17.   Ride the bus or train – and be amazed at the creativity it inspires

18.   Go somewhere old and act differently – observe how people respond

19.   Take a class – most community colleges and local universities offer cheap, fun classes through their extension programs. Also, check out free online classes

20.   Attend your local government meeting – want to see conflict in action? Go to a town meeting.

21.   Write a short story and submit it somewhere

22.   Go to a theme park and people watch

23.   Take pictures and tell a picture story

24.   Join a meetup on something you have passion for

25.   Discover your romance name – or other silly things that can inspire you to think differently

 What do you do when you can't write? Share your tips in the comments.

Stop Your Yo-yo Writing Diet Now!

There I was, in my writers group, sucking down my healthy snack and a good cup of coffee, listening to my fellow wannabe authors round-robin their week’s progress, looking for support to overcome their obstacles. And then it hit me – substitute words written for pounds lost and I’m in Weight Watchers for Authors.

Last post I talked about time management for writers and starting the new year with goal setting. But most writers have writing goals. The problem is, we aren’t meeting them. The number one issue facing many aspiring writers is not their writing talent or craft development, it's figuring out how to manage a writing life and a real life.

Goals and Desire Are Not Enough

Like the aspiring pound-dropping, healthy eater, we often start the week determined to meet our word or chapter goal, only to find ourselves at week’s end disappointed with the results. It was a bad week at work or with the family, we tell ourselves. Or the migraine flared up. Or I couldn’t possibly stick to the plan with the season premiere of Breaking Bad tempting me worse than a desert table at a Christmas party. So the manuscript sits until we can haul ourselves back to it through brute force. Before we know it, we've been on and off the yo-yo diet so many times our wip is dizzy…So we tell ourselves that we need more discipline, like the yo-yo dieters who tell themselves they need to have more willpower.

To stop the yo-yo writer's diet you must have a success system.

As much as dieters can’t willpower themselves to a gym routine and a ten pound weight loss, writers can’t discipline themselves into getting a 1000 words a day on the page. Instead we must put a system in place that sets us up for success. It is not enough to have a goal to write. To effectively execute any goal or change, we need a reinforcing set of support mechanisms that will keep us on track even when our discipline and willpower aren’t flowing at a 10. The system is like the safety net under the tightrope - if we fall, the system bounces us right back up.

What’s in a good system (and will it cost me 3 low payments of 19.99?)

Like no single diet works for everyone, everyone’s writing system will be different, as well. But a good system will have three things in common:

1. You system must maximize your strengths
There’s a segment of management theory that says you can’t help someone overcome their weaknesses, you can only play to their strengths. We all have times when writing comes easy.  For me, the words flow easiest in the morning. I’ve found that I’m a burster who likes writing big chunks in a sitting and then not writing (or preferably doing anything else either) at all for a while. My system doesn’t include a daily word goal. Instead, I have a week’s goal based on a daily average and I arrange my day so that it starts with writing when possible.



2. Your system must help you avoid your triggers to failure
When I’m tired I can’t write and I eat too much. By the time I’m tired, I have no hope of stopping myself from eating or motivating myself into getting in the words. Part of my system is to ensure I’m managing my schedule to keep from getting too tired. And when I know I have tiring times coming up, I don't include writing in my plan. 

To do this, you must know what your triggers are and that typically doesn't happen unless we are analyzing our failures. This can take some time to discover, but with each new discovery, should come an adjustment to your system.



3. Your system must help you stomp out your procrastination derailers
While triggers suck your will to write, derailers take your will and have it focus on something else. If you are someone who gets lost in social media, install a social media blocking app, turn off your wireless or take your laptop where there is no wifi. Are you supposed to be writing on your lunch hour but find yourself chatting with colleagues in the lunch room? Start taking your lunch and eating at your desk.

A writing system is not one thing. It is a series of things that work together to get you off the binge-purge-self-esteem-bashing cycle of the yo-yo writer.

And like with dieting, if you fall off the writing wagon, evaluate what happened, tweak your system to compensate if needed, and get right back at it.

Now, while I eat my doughnut,  hit me in the comments with what is working well for you in your writing system and what you know you need to tweak? 

If you're enjoying my series on time management tips for writers, get more of it in my email newsletter.

3 Tips to a Successful Writer's New Year

Despite having been out of school more years that I’m comfortable admitting on a public blog, I am one of those people who still looks to the Fall start of school as the beginning of the new year.

In addition to the New Year being a good excuse to drink champagne, it’s also a time for reflection on the year past and time to focus on what comes next.

For those who have followed the short life of my blog you already know my last year has been filled with change and adventure.

But with the New Year, it’s time to look forward. 

As you will discover in my bio section, in my day job I am a certified project manager (or a PiMP to use my daughters lingo).  I also have four kids, three pets, two businesses,  two houses (one being sold and one new house that needs work), one manuscript on submission with publishers and two WIPs.

Translated – I am currently a task juggling fool.

Luckily, two things that I have absolute passion for are task/time management and the science of creativity with an emphasis on how these two can intersect.  The only way I have been able to survive my current load is by experimenting and finding secrets to time management and applying those that work. While there is certainly plenty of advice in the world on time management, not much of it is focused at writers and creative people. In fact, I often find that many creative people have bought into the myth that creativity cannot be managed. That is a theme worth exploring.

To that end, for the next while I will be focusing on time/task management for writers and how science can make your creativity more efficient.

So, no time like the present. Today’s post focuses on the New Year and making your writer year the best it can be.

3 Tips for a Successful Writers New Year

1. Set Goals - 

As a writer, if you do nothing else for yourself, please, please, please set a goal or goals for the coming year in writing.

Quick tips to good goals:

•           Do not worry about how you will achieve your goal. Simply have one makes you more likely to achieve it. Your subconscious is a powerful thing. I will focus more on goal achievement in coming blogs.
•           Your goals must be SMART (Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant and Time bound) – example – will write 4,000 words a week for the next six months
•           You must write your goals down – You’re a writer, so this should be obvious, but so many writers I’ve met don’t do this. They have a goal in their head. This won’t cut it. Science shows that one of the best ways to achieve your goals to put them in writing.
•           You must keep your goals a secret – This is counter intuitive and flies in the face of what we yoyo dieters have been told, but studies show that when you share your goals, you are less likely to achieve them.

2. Commit to Doing Something Different – 

Many of you have tried goal setting before and failed miserably. To achieve your goal this time, you must commit to doing something different, to trying new things to get you there. You don’t have to know what those things are yet, but you must write down that you will be open to exploring and then set time aside each week, even if it’s only a small amount.

3. Write Something Personal - 

I’m in my second week of being on submission to publishers. Before that, it was the agent chase, with its countless rejections (I am now represented by the delightful Lotus Lane Literary). Before that, it was trying to finish my wip and managing beta’s and critique groups while juggling everything else, before that…before that…before that…

I am sure your writer’s story looks similar to mine. In all of the chasing it is easy to forget why we write, the power of writing and what has meaning. As I was researching something on story structure last week, I ran into a post from Larry Brooks that was a great reminder to me of the power of words:

http://storyfix.com/the-most-important-thing-you%E2%80%99ll-ever-write (it's a moving post, worth your time)

Larry reminds us that in the pursuit for fame, fortune, glory or discovery of our work by the rest of the world, the most important things we will ever write are ones to those closest to us. As our family and friends put up with a lot for us to pursue writing, remember them in your writing this year. Adding this step to your writing routine and goals is sure to make you feel better about your writing.

And a happy writer is a productive writer.

Are you setting goals this year and have you written them down? Share your tricks in the comments.